It’s true, I am an elephant!
In fact, I’ve always been!
I’ve got this trunk way up in front,
Stuck here, right in-between…
I’ve got two tusks that weigh a ton
That press and push and poke
And it’s like God was having fun
And thinks it’s all a joke…
I’ve got these massive ears as well,
Like pizzas piping hot
And four feet that are bound to swell,
So thankful I am not…
I’ve got a teeny-weeny tail
That I’m too fat to see,
That swirls around when there’s a gale
And keeps on swatting me…
Now, is this fair? Now, is this right?
Just munching all day long…
To end up bloated through the night,
Like something’s really wrong?
With pesky flies upon my hide
And birds upon my back,
My word, the times I’ve sighed and sighed
I can’t give them a whack…
And when I run, it’s hard to stop,
Fair warning, please stand clear,
‘Cos if you don’t, you’re sure to drop,
Squashed flat when I come near…
And must the sun be oh so bright?
It really hurts my eyes…
But no-one listens to my plight,
Again, that’s no surprise…
No wonder, then, I’ve had enough!
I’d rather be a cat!
If not, I’d rather be a dove,
A pigeon or a bat!
If not, I’d rather be a cow,
A horse, that’s what I want!
Just anything, because right now,
I am an elephant!